Nearly two. We’re escaping the New Zealand winter, to enjoy some sunshine in Rarotonga. Another family holiday to cherish and remember forever. What a joy to us you are, my love. And such a blessing.
How important it is to continue dating one another, long after you are married or have entered that comfortable stage in a relationship… and it’s especially important after you have a child. So much of our time and energy and thoughts and love are now dedicated to our little ones. The time and energy and thoughts and love that had once belonged to our other half… the very reason for us having children in the first place!
How easy it is to fall into those domestic routines, and comfortable habits, and take one another for granted, and only see each other in a domestic/child rearing environment. How easy it becomes to accept one another as tired, fed up, exhausted, ‘got-work-to-do.’ To no longer see the enthusiasm they once expressed for you. To forget the desire they still feel, slightly deeper now, below the surface. Therefore, how important is is… how essential… to keep dating.
Take the time to be together; talk to each other; dress up a bit; hold hands; remember why it is you are sharing this path. And how much you love it.
We must keep on falling in love, not only for ourselves, but for the little ones. We are their role models in all things. How important it is to set an example of how to love. How to cherish our partners, and our relationships – how to prioritise and value them.
Romance isn’t always about fine clothing and expensive dinners, tickets to shows, or luxurious weekends away. It’s not always about bottles of wine, decadent desserts, or extravagant bouquets of flowers. It’s making sure your one good pair of jeans is clean so you can wear it to go out with your husband tonight. It’s spending less at the supermarket so you can go see a movie this week, instead of waiting for payday next week. It’s planning a couple of hours to walk along the beach and go get an ice-cream, because the last time you went you barked at him for forgetting the wet wipes and attempting to wash your sticky toddler’s face with tissues. It’s sitting down wondering what ‘interesting’ thing you could possibly muster the energy to do together, and still feeling butterflies when he puts his arm around you. It’s walking beside her and never getting tired of seeing the sunlight on her face.
By taking the time to date one another, when we are at our most busy and most tired and most fraught – it’s remembering to say to each other what matters most: I love you, I’m yours, and thank you.
The fragrance of the ripe mandarin tree; cousins lending a hand; puppy love; games with daddy; building forts; tickle chase; growing bumps; Uncle Joe; peppa pig; and bacon sandwiches. Family-time.
A wintry weekend spent in Rotorua: Car trip, sunset, hot-tub and cuddles. Frosty mornings, animals, and jumping in puddles. Green, green grass; picnics and slides. Fluffy and cake when it’s cold outside. Climbing through trees and warm redwood light. Travels with you and the world feels right…
On Sunday mornings we appreciate life, for what it is. We have our health, our love, and this day before us. We slow down a little… a lot. We sit together. We read, we talk, we share our food, and there really isn’t much else we need. On Sundays.
Sundays spent by the seaside. Collecting rocks and pretty shells. Digging sand. Chasing gulls. Flappy wings… not a fan. The air whips through our hair, blowing cobwebs away. The winter sun is low in the sky, sparkling on the waves. Nana comes – running with wide open arms. Poppa too. Walking, picnicking on the tartan rug. Egg sandwiches. Shoo birds. Go-way. Mumma has to leave early for a rescheduled appointment. How I would much rather stay with my boys, building castles by the sea.
Crisp winter days. Fresh air and cooler winds. Afternoons spent at the park. Collecting rocks, crunching fallen leaves. Birds fly over-head, in search of food. We stop to watch them. The crackle of static when you ‘wheee!’ down the slide. Perfect pieces of bark. Bright red; the ‘nee nor’ fire truck. Watching the sun set and the moon rise higher in the sky. The promise of a warm meal and cuddles with daddy. It’s time to head home again.Through the trees. Past the river. Bye-bye to the pukekos and ducks. Up the hill, and round the corner, cars whizzing past. You hum a song I’ve not heard before. Your nose is cold when I kiss it. Park life.